elijah (elijah)
11-07-2004, 05:21 AM
I spent over 20 years in a Reformed Baptist Church. Looking back I see a number of cultic tendencies in that church and the Reformed Baptist movement at large.
There was so much concern about appearences. There was a definite though subtle legalism and pressure to conform to that legalism.
The 1689 Baptist Confession was often used in a way that put it in on equal authority with Scripture, and that contrary to the express statements of the confession itself.
There was an authoritarian excersise of power by the elders. There was real lack of effective accountability of the elders to the congregation at large. The elders were effectivly self-sustaining with nominal on the surface input from the congregation. They also controlled the deacons.
The pulpit was often used to bully the congregation. Berating and threatening the congregation happened on a regular basis in business meetings. Elders showed and expressed resentment towards any who asked hard questions in those meetings.
So called "oversight" was mandatory. An elder would come to the home and ask personal questions regarding family life and ect... Often they would give advice that was inappropriate and which would cause un-nessecary problems between spouses and other family relationships. Their inept counseling contributed to the breakup of several families.
And the counseling was inept. They claimed they were doing "Biblical counseling". Looking back it was often far from Biblical. And some of the elders had the gall to give cousel when their own marrigaes and family life were a real mess. One elder admitted to me that he had virtually no real training in counseling, Biblical or otherwise.
The elders spurned the discipline of exegetical expository preaching. Application often went far beyond the text it was supposedly based on.
I could go on and on. Women were second classs citizens, and could not ask questions in the Sunday school class or audibly give requests in prayer meeting. Often in relation to women the elders would beat the drum of "submission". In the meantime tyranical husbands were handled with kid gloves. Why? Because the elders themselves were tyranical in their home and the church.
Children were to be seen, but not heard. Children as young as three or four were expected to sit thorough the service with their parents and listen to preaching way beyond thier comprehension. ..and in some familes, woe to the child that even thought of wiggling...
The authoritarinism in the eldership also set the example for the husband and father in the home. Men who did not rule their home with the "firmness" with which the elders ruled the church were considered weak and less then manly. In one case a good friend came to the conclusion he was not saved, and was told he was not saved becuase he would not rule his house in the "approved" manner. Since leaving the church he has again regained his assurance of salvation, and his wife's respect.
In another family where the husband and father set an example of real Biblical servant leadership, the wife felt pressure to be dis-sastisfied with her husband because he didn't "measure up". That family left too. and in a number of cases including my own, when families left that church, there was often a marked improvement in the relationship between the husband and wife.
I know there are other ex-Reformed Baptists out there somewhere. Where are you? We need to raise our voices and let it be known that these churches and the movement they are a part of is not all it seems to be on the outside. People considering going to a Reformed Baptist church need to be fully aware of what they are getting themselves into.
There was so much concern about appearences. There was a definite though subtle legalism and pressure to conform to that legalism.
The 1689 Baptist Confession was often used in a way that put it in on equal authority with Scripture, and that contrary to the express statements of the confession itself.
There was an authoritarian excersise of power by the elders. There was real lack of effective accountability of the elders to the congregation at large. The elders were effectivly self-sustaining with nominal on the surface input from the congregation. They also controlled the deacons.
The pulpit was often used to bully the congregation. Berating and threatening the congregation happened on a regular basis in business meetings. Elders showed and expressed resentment towards any who asked hard questions in those meetings.
So called "oversight" was mandatory. An elder would come to the home and ask personal questions regarding family life and ect... Often they would give advice that was inappropriate and which would cause un-nessecary problems between spouses and other family relationships. Their inept counseling contributed to the breakup of several families.
And the counseling was inept. They claimed they were doing "Biblical counseling". Looking back it was often far from Biblical. And some of the elders had the gall to give cousel when their own marrigaes and family life were a real mess. One elder admitted to me that he had virtually no real training in counseling, Biblical or otherwise.
The elders spurned the discipline of exegetical expository preaching. Application often went far beyond the text it was supposedly based on.
I could go on and on. Women were second classs citizens, and could not ask questions in the Sunday school class or audibly give requests in prayer meeting. Often in relation to women the elders would beat the drum of "submission". In the meantime tyranical husbands were handled with kid gloves. Why? Because the elders themselves were tyranical in their home and the church.
Children were to be seen, but not heard. Children as young as three or four were expected to sit thorough the service with their parents and listen to preaching way beyond thier comprehension. ..and in some familes, woe to the child that even thought of wiggling...
The authoritarinism in the eldership also set the example for the husband and father in the home. Men who did not rule their home with the "firmness" with which the elders ruled the church were considered weak and less then manly. In one case a good friend came to the conclusion he was not saved, and was told he was not saved becuase he would not rule his house in the "approved" manner. Since leaving the church he has again regained his assurance of salvation, and his wife's respect.
In another family where the husband and father set an example of real Biblical servant leadership, the wife felt pressure to be dis-sastisfied with her husband because he didn't "measure up". That family left too. and in a number of cases including my own, when families left that church, there was often a marked improvement in the relationship between the husband and wife.
I know there are other ex-Reformed Baptists out there somewhere. Where are you? We need to raise our voices and let it be known that these churches and the movement they are a part of is not all it seems to be on the outside. People considering going to a Reformed Baptist church need to be fully aware of what they are getting themselves into.