| Author | Message | ||
     87expellee New member Username: 87expellee Post Number: 7 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 66.78.122.247 |
Due to the recent press I imagine there will be a lot more people watching this forum. As I am having difficulty even remembering what happened to me there ( I have been related stories in the past couple of days of my being stood up and berated in front of the entire school, THAT I DON'T EVEN REMEMBER !!! ) I am having even greater difficulty putting names and faces to hints and clues in these stories. I boarded there for 85-87, was a top student (academically), expelled twice in Grade 13 (for no good reason, although it was the best thing that ever happened to me) As a result, I lacked any motivation or direction. In many ways I am still trying to find it today. A few of you have related stories of adoption and birth parents. I would like to speak with you as I have gone through the entire process. Please email me at : exoticsmoker@gmail.com Dave | ||
| sheilac Junior Member Username: sheilac Post Number: 38 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.54.18.177 |
How strange that you are having difficulty remembering what happened to you at Grenville (?). I don't compute. As I mentioned before anyone who wants to get in touch with me can do so at skosullivan@yahoo.com Betty Boop, write to me! I'd like to connect with you. | ||
| 87expellee New member Username: 87expellee Post Number: 8 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 66.78.122.247 |
Apparently I had blocked it out. As the story was related to me I was stood up in front of the head table at dinner and screamed at for several minutes by FF and Ortolani for something trivial that my storyteller couldn't remember. Everyone was then asked to raise their hand if they were willing to tell on me in the future when I did something wrong. Makes me wonder what else I blocked out as I was not exactly a model Grenville citizen... | ||
| sheilac Junior Member Username: sheilac Post Number: 39 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.54.17.118 |
87expellee wrote: "As the story was related to me I was stood up in front of the head table at dinner and screamed at for several minutes by FF and Ortolani for something trivial that my storyteller couldn't remember. Everyone was then asked to raise their hand if they were willing to tell on me in the future when I did something wrong." Does sound like a typical scenario. | ||
| spain New member Username: spain Post Number: 23 Registered: 5-2006 Posted From: 69.204.218.39 |
It is very, very common for our psyche to totally block out traumatic memories. It's a matter of survival. We all cope in diff ways. | ||
| bonnieb New member Username: bonnieb Post Number: 11 Registered: 1-2007 Posted From: 170.215.128.211 |
Sorry to butt in. 87expelle, it is not unusual to block out traumatic experiences. Many survivors of the C of J, myself included, have a very difficult time remembering more than bits and pieces of our lives there. Others remember every little detail. It's all in how your brain processes trauma. You may have dreams that bring things back, you may remember more as time goes on, or you may not, depending on what your brain can handle. It's hard, but don't worry too much. You're not alone. | ||
| sheilac Junior Member Username: sheilac Post Number: 40 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.54.17.118 |
Actually, again speaking of getting in touch with people, I would really like to hear from Hightide. If you could e-mail me, I would greatly appreciate it. | ||
| quietgrl New member Username: quietgrl Post Number: 10 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 24.226.102.190 |
When I found myself in a room with staff... and I knew what was going to come next...ie... asking me to confess my sins... for what I had done and planned to do...etc... I would start playing the album "A Concert in the Park" by Simon and Garfunkel... (working my way through the album...) I would know I was in the room for hours... but could only hear the soundtrack... (OMG... just made a connection... I have always said that "The Graduate" was my fav. film but did not know why... I just put it together as I wrote this... I was like Dustin at the bottom of the pool when they were chewing me out... wow... good to know... about my self... smile...) If it looked like Miss J (as she was always there ....) was getting really mad... I would clue in ... listen for a moment... it would invariably make me cry... she would back down a bit... and I would start the songs going... so... my memories... are of the words here and there that I allowed myself to hear... amazing how the brain works... also amazing... I still love that album... I found a place of peace within it... | ||
| kathleen_millar New member Username: kathleen_millar Post Number: 2 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 70.66.197.66 |
Hello all, I am using my real name because I want to connect with others who were at Grenville alongside me or who remember me. I attended the school from 1984-1988 when I graduated. I then stayed for a year and a half as a staff member so I imagine some students may remember me. I had a dream last night about being at Grenville and there was a woman there who kept telling me it was still the 80's. I laughed at her and said it wasn't. As I awoke I realized there was still a part of me that was living out the time I spent at Grenville. I thought I'd dealt with most of me 'stuff' around that time in my life. Then I open my yahoo account today and several people have emailed the Globe and Mail article to me. Astounding how the universe conspires to have us open old wounds - only when we're ready!!! So, if anyone would like to be in contact with me that would be great. My email is hollowbone33@yahoo.ca. I want to be a positive force on this forum....I am not a religious person but as they say.... " I am spiritual". I would like to know if others completely rejected religion which then forced them onto a personal path of revelation.... Kathleen | ||
| gcc_1981_grad New member Username: gcc_1981_grad Post Number: 1 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.48.65.37 |
Hello everyone - I am not sure if anyone will remember me. I attended the school from 1979-81. It would be great to hear from you - rhv@sympatico.ca Richard V. | ||
| wagener84 Member Username: wagener84 Post Number: 57 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 68.151.117.98 |
gcc_1981...would you be Richard Van Dusen? If it is...how are you doing man? I remeber you well because you used to make me laugh my ••• off!! This is Michael Wagener, class of 84. Are you going to the closing? | ||
| gcc_1981_grad New member Username: gcc_1981_grad Post Number: 10 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.48.65.37 |
I remember you also. I am planning on going yes. | ||
| jonnymac New member Username: jonnymac Post Number: 2 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 99.245.142.243 |
Wagner - I totally remember you man! And Richard as well. I was at GCC 78-81 and in trouble for most of my stay. I guess that I was just angry and wrong all the time - must have been either Rush or Supertramp's bad influence on me! I just found out about this forum and signed up. Hope to catch up with everyone who is still dealing with this as I am. Cheers Jonathan McCready | ||
| wagener84 Member Username: wagener84 Post Number: 61 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 68.151.117.98 |
Hey Jonathan...weren't you related to the Haigs? Maybe Im wrong but part of me recalls Mary always giving you the gears in front of the school. Do you have any contact with her and has her personality changed at all over the years? Yeah...that damn rock music..sure screwed me up too! Had I burnt all my rock music like they told me too back in 77 I probably wouldn't have suffered any abuse. lol... Pretty laughable stuff now upon reflection! | ||
| tabby1979 Junior Member Username: tabby1979 Post Number: 44 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.69.121.31 |
Hey Jonathan - now I remember you.....wow all these names coming back, names I thought I would never hear of again lol...good to have you on board here Jon... Lois Gamble (Dalton) (Tabby - I go by Tabby more now  ) | ||
| oneflewover New member Username: oneflewover Post Number: 13 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 74.108.103.175 |
Tabby I tried to email you but it bounced back to me. | ||
| tabby1979 Junior Member Username: tabby1979 Post Number: 45 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.69.121.31 |
Hi Oneflew - here it is again....tabbytabby2000@hotmail.com. Try again. It is not full and I check it daily. | ||
| lavendergirl New member Username: lavendergirl Post Number: 1 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 58.107.98.141 |
Hey Jonnymac Great to see you on here! I lived with you and your mom for a year while I was studying in Toronto. Glad to hear things have worked out ok for you - life was a bit worrying back then, wasn't it. I have been thinking about you lately and wondering how you were, so it's good you've been able to connect. | ||
| jungle_john New member Username: jungle_john Post Number: 1 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 70.51.164.129 |
What a strange couple of days. I thought GCC was behind me. 81-84 Jungle John | ||
| jonnymac New member Username: jonnymac Post Number: 7 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 99.245.142.243 |
G'day Lavendergirl! I am extremely cool as always. Been around the world - even made a documentary film in Antarctica. What has life brought to you? drop me a line if you like jonathan@joboda.com Cheers | ||
| wagener84 Member Username: wagener84 Post Number: 65 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 199.214.192.50 |
Its behind you alright. Unfortunately, because of the pain and suffering just below the surface..you might as well be bent over!! | ||
| jonnymac New member Username: jonnymac Post Number: 8 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 99.245.142.243 |
Hey Mike W Yes I was and still am related. I don't keep contact with any of them except for one of my cousins. I tried to bury the hatchet but am just not a big enough man I guess. She said and did some pretty bad things including telling me that my father was probably a homosexual - which he ain't. She had a very deep and personal vendetta against my dad. As his son I was the perfect object for her to project her feelings on. I don't think that her personality has changed one iota. I still have all of my old vinyl records too! Cheers JMC | ||
| gccsurvivor New member Username: gccsurvivor Post Number: 2 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 207.216.137.218 |
Would love to hear from those who helped me through that strange and repulsive experience. Susan Butler '79 surfers@uniserve.com | ||
| strength Junior Member Username: strength Post Number: 26 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 192.197.95.253 |
Sitting Bull, how are you? | ||
| klein88 New member Username: klein88 Post Number: 3 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 203.162.3.154 |
I was also expelled for questionable reasons. I still never have had my question answered... Why? It brings back memories reading everyone's posts. Does everyone share similar memories that the best times at GCC were little things. The sad thing for me in my 3 years at the school, I do not remember many happy times. I remember late night talks with friends or little events that happen outside the forever watchful eyes of the staff and its extended family. I always remember living in fear of when the next time I was going to be called out for something. I was surprised about how little they knew about me as a person after 3 years of attending this boarding school. They knew my family so well as I was the 3rd of three boys to attend the school. (9 years of family history). The final remark made to me be for I was sent home was I was being locking in the room on the 3rd floor of the school (3 hours plus) because they were worried I would burn down the school. I remember saying to myself, are they talking to the right person? I never had a violent side to me (Lover not a fighter). Truly amazing how they perceived things. I also understand the staff kids were under great pressure. Something I did not understand at that point in my life. I am writing this post in support to all of you. Though I still feel how I was treated was unjust, I have come to terms with it many years ago. I hope all of you will also find peace of mind. | ||
| certavi_et_vici Member Username: certavi_et_vici Post Number: 52 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 71.191.96.59 |
klein88, We were in the choir together. I remember when you were expelled and it was so bizarre. I kept asking the question, "What did he do wrong?" No one was able to give a sound answer. They humiliated you in front of the entire school, but as I recall Farnsworth never gave a reason. You were very well behaved; not remotely rebellious in any way; and a very good student. It was as if, like some others, you had a target on your back. I have come to the conclusion that FF was disturbed and his decisions to target certain people were totally irrational. All the best, | ||
| klein88 New member Username: klein88 Post Number: 4 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 203.162.3.154 |
I have a question. Did Farnsworth give a reason for the anythings he did. It was apparent to me and I sure for others back then, Farnworth was quite effective in removing opposition. Be it in the student body or amoung the staff. I did have an attitude. It was the result of being perplexed by the strange logic in which the school operated under. I do believe that the Farnsworth family had no love for the Klein family. I felt at time it was person. I remember when they gave me the paddle 3 times for having a bad attitude. Don Farnworth removed me from his math class and told me to follow him down to his father's office. They told me it was for me my own good. Hands on the chair arms and three good ones on the behind. I remember being in shock and being asked to remove my wallet. I remember being numb with fear. I hated the fact that he made me hug him afterwards. It like I was saying he was right for doing it. I also rememeber play soccer for the GCC team that afternoon. I fell on my behind and sat there for a second thinking, why am I doing this for them after how they treated me. The memories keep coming back. | ||
| tomrossini Junior Member Username: tomrossini Post Number: 49 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 70.230.9.226 |
Hey there Mr Klein.. I remember you very well, infact I think we spent days together on "D" as well as in the infirmary... I am not sure what you did but I do remember that on most occasions I knew why I was on "D" but in my mind they were very questionable and in my opinion of little merit. Now that is not to say that there were times when I did not deserve being on "D" but those were times I was trying to be suspended and expelled. | ||
| martin_whyte New member Username: martin_whyte Post Number: 1 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 24.226.110.184 |
hi all it is great to see your names on here... in spite of why... my name is here as well for all the same reasons... hope you are doing great in spite of ff etc... look forward to seeing you at closing... martin whyte perth ont. | ||
| breaker_19_girl Intermediate Member Username: breaker_19_girl Post Number: 206 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 64.187.49.29 |
Hi Martin, I have a feeling you were in my class. And, did your mom not teach remedial stuff?? Hey Klein 88.... I knew a brother or two of yours me thinks... I was gone by the time you got there... Liane Marie Ross | ||
| stephenklein86 New member Username: stephenklein86 Post Number: 1 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 130.63.237.59 |
As my brother says, there was definitely no love for the Kleins at Grenville. I spent many times on "D" doing pots and pans but always managed to talk my way out of any more serious "attitude" counciling sessions. I knew what they wanted to hear so I provided the lip-service they required to leave me alone. It was as if they had a need to expose sin to appease themselves that they were doing "God's work". My silent rebellion was with a very select few friends whom I knew could be trusted since they felt exactly as I did. We kept each other sane especially during the singling out of students during the days' long insanity of emergency school wide "Why is God unhappy with us" sessions. I remember one time when Mr. Tingley (one of the nicest guys you would probably meet anywhere) fell through the pond ice on the tractor when getting it ready for skating. Everyone was called into the dining room where the inquisition began. I and several others (including friends mentioned before) were berated for attitude which was situation normal though always dreaded conclusion. I shared the same feeling at the time of why should I do anything for this school when they treat us as they do. I always felt that I had slipped under the radar and got off easy from the psychological effects of Grenville and their controlling ways. However, the effects were still felt. Being under a yoke of that level on control was damaging since I realise now that I didn't know how to deal with instant freedom once the yoke was off. I suffered in university due to poor study habits as I felt studying was too controlling over me because of how I experienced studing at Grenville. Is this all Grenville's fault, I don't know but this is what I realise and feel about it now. It is the truth for me. Later, when more mature and perhaps maturity was a factor, I returned to university to get my degree. Grenville contained many positive times for me but it rarely involved a staff member. My greatest feeling of loss of opportunity was not being able to see Dr. John Stewart before he passed away. Never had I met a more caring and great man as he. Honourable mention would be for Judy Stewart (at the time) because she had a good sense of humour. | ||
| stephenklein86 New member Username: stephenklein86 Post Number: 2 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 130.63.237.59 |
BTW, Hi Liane, I remember you. Nice to hear (read) from you! | ||
| tinkerbell84 New member Username: tinkerbell84 Post Number: 3 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 88.134.236.100 |
Hello Stephen, I remember you very well and in reading your posting above it appears we share very similar thoughts. You perfectly described how I felt/feel about things - I too thought I "slipped under the radar" only to realize later that there were lasting effects. I also refused university immediately after graduation because I couldn't bear the idea of being controlled in another educational institute. Strange how things turn out. Great to see you here and feel free to e-mail me - I'd love to hear from you! Karen Bell jessandrak@netscape.net (Message edited by tinkerbell84 on September 24, 2007) | ||
| martin_whyte New member Username: martin_whyte Post Number: 2 Registered: 9-2007 Posted From: 24.226.110.184 |
hi again yes that was me... quasi staff kid... all the responsibilities blah blah anyway fyi bill tingley moved away from gcc to perth where i had the opportunity to renew friendships... his wife and kids stayed there... i think wife still is... he got sick and eventually had to go back as he had noone else. he was from usa.. I went to see him there before he died. he was glad for the visit but i think unhappy living back there. but he had no where else to go. he moved tp perth so he could be somewhat close to his kids... he was an ordained minister but never went back to preaching after grenville.. martin | ||
| breaker_19_girl Intermediate Member Username: breaker_19_girl Post Number: 229 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 64.187.49.143 |
As I do recall he was a minister... | ||
| tmw Member Username: tmw Post Number: 62 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 67.71.153.158 |
I remember Mr. Tingley.....it was as though he was there one day and gone the next. I recall him stopping in once for a visit and he seemed quite happy. This would have been the school year 85-86?? maybe 86-87?? I had no idea what had happened to him, but I always wondered. But as we all know, "those" types of questions were always deemed inappropriate. I am quite saddened to hear A) that he "had" to return to GCC and B) that he has died. I always like Mr. Tingley. | ||
| sandrabrownearly Junior Member Username: sandrabrownearly Post Number: 36 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 162.83.61.245 |
I have three yearbooks. 81-82 - I see Mrs. Tingley, no Mr. Tingley 82-83 - Same thing 83-84 - They're both in there. Maybe I missed him in the first two, but I can't find him. Is this Paul and Sue's Dad? | ||
| cryfreedom Intermediate Member Username: cryfreedom Post Number: 153 Registered: 6-2006 Posted From: 24.226.27.60 |
Yes Paul and Sue's Dad. | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 6 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
brendabrown, i remember you, but i don't know if you'd remember me, i was at least 2 yrs. younger, were you friends with Debbie someone? she was my roommate my first year there. i was a real little "rebel" apparently. actually, i just stuck up for myself, i knew bonnie kneadam, jane logan, elke hollenbauk, mike loew (boyfriend at one point actually) | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 7 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
wagener...i might remember you...first name start with m? | ||
| sandrabrownearly Junior Member Username: sandrabrownearly Post Number: 49 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 162.83.61.245 |
Heather...I didn't see Brenda on this thread, but this is Sandra! All three Brown girls went to the closing...were you the same age as Debra? And yes, that's Mike Wagener...he has posted his name on here several times so I know he won't mind me "outing" him. If you want to connect but aren't ready to become public on this site, feel free to email me at sandra.early@verizon.net | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 10 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
Hi Sandra, sorry, I was confusing Brenda and the last name with someone else I know by that name. Anyway, I wasn't the same age as Debbie. I was her pesky little roommate in gr. 10. She was I think in gr. 12? I am sure I remember Mike as well. Thanks for the email address. This is all so daunting. | ||
| breaker_19_girl Intermediate Member Username: breaker_19_girl Post Number: 265 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 64.187.48.155 |
Heatherbell, you are really making me think... When you mention Mike Loew as 1 time boyfriend and Brian tingle... and mix that with Jane Logan... Plus your expulsion... I have to wonder if I do recall you by another name.... Does your explulsion have to do with helping people make a mad dash outta dodge? And, did I used to sleep over at your house?? Does the name wrinkie ring a bell? | ||
| breaker_19_girl Intermediate Member Username: breaker_19_girl Post Number: 266 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 64.187.48.155 |
never mind... I knew it was you... you just e-mailed me.... hahahahaha | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 15 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
OMG!!! Wrinkie?? Was that my nickname? It sounds so familiar. it escapes me, but I know I should know why...like I said, my memory isn't what it used to be!!! Yours is obviously alive and well, since you can remember every little detail from 25 yrs. ago!! Holy smokes! By the way, my identity is probably pretty obvious to a lot of people now! Weren't those clues in my private email to yo? LOL Imagine remembering watching Conan! Holy rip dips! | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 16 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
you know what?> I think I had a sweatshirt with that name put on it hmmmm i wish i had your memory... | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 17 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
and hey, you gotta admit, it was a hellofa plan wasn't it? carried out like true detectives...lol it worked too, but i heard they broke up in Ottawa, or maybe that was just some bshi* i heard from staff? | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 18 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
BTW 87expellee...if you weren't exactly a model student there,..that probably just means you were actually a human being, and not one of their programmed little robots I experienced a lot of the same lack of direction and motivation and also am finding it only recently, the only thing i have done heart and soul is raising my daughters | ||
| breaker_19_girl Intermediate Member Username: breaker_19_girl Post Number: 267 Registered: 8-2007 Posted From: 64.187.48.84 |
No Wrinkie, They made it to the hwy and he wanted to go to Ottawa and she Toronto, so they parted on the 401. hahahaha... The story you likely heard from me... because he came back a couple weeks later and she never did!! LOL.... too funny!! I got the worst "D" in all my time for that one... Poor Logan got suspeneded.... 3 days I think. Then a few months later her and I got the big boot for kissing boys... | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 20 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
NO WAY!! Boy you sure are filling me in! I never knew what happened after I left. I"m sorry you got D. I thought I could trust her, I'm really shocked to find out it was her that ratted. Are you sure it was her??? I can't believe it, that's such a let down. Honestly, I don't remember half of what you do. I remember looking through my bedroom window to see that they got away okay. That's about my last memory of it, except for sitting in the headmasters office hearing those blessed words "you are expelled." (YEEEHAAA) I couldn't keep the smile off my face, it made FF so mad!! hahaha I thought all this time it was someone else that had told, maybe my roommate. I'm so sorry I got you and other people in ****! What did they nail you and Jane for? What did you do? Anything? Or was it that you just knew about it? What were we in the infirmery for? Kissing boys eh?? (I just bet that was Janie and Bri, the little brat!! But he was pretty cute, what's a guy to do??)You too eh? hehehee Gosh, the sin of it all. LOL. What did they expect? THat's the dumnest thing I ever heard, having a coed school but NO relationships aloud. Ya whatever, like that's going to happen!! Dream on McDuff! ARe you going to email me back or what woman? LOL!! We've got some major catching up to do... | ||
| heatherbell New member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 21 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
BTW...he came back??? Boy, he sure had cojones... | ||
| heatherbell Junior Member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 26 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
breaker-19 DUH, wrote them myself, showing my age again, told you my memory sucked!! Where've you been? I am looking so forward to talking with you. | ||
| heatherbell Junior Member Username: heatherbell Post Number: 27 Registered: 10-2007 Posted From: 24.64.223.204 |
breaker-19 DUH, wrote them myself, showing my age again, told you my memory sucked!! Where've you been? I am looking so forward to talking with you. |
