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     faye (faye) Intermediate Member Username: faye Post Number: 135 Registered: 10-2005 Posted From: 206.148.96.233 |
Here is the letter I was talking about.... Very thought provoking if you can hear this man's heart as he works through all the heartbreak and confusion of finding his way. Personally I'd love to hear how his story finally ends up! Dear Brother,…………..(snipped a bunch here)... also said that you and your family had recently left the Twelve Tribes Communities. I know it has been hard for you and your family. I will be very honest with you! It is for some the hardest and most costly decision you may have ever made. Be encouraged. God is Love, and Love Is Everywhere. Now hopefully a short history of my experience with this "Church” The Twelve Tribes. My wife and I had been through the gamut of the so-called "Church denominations". The last one being the "Church" of The Anabaptists, Mennonites / Amish for several years. I believe that they for a longtime of their 500 yr existence's were the remnant of "True Church" But somewhere along the way they somehow exchanged the Anointing of the Holy Ghost for Conformity and living the Plain Life, looking and living a certain way. After leaving our small farm in Virginia, Deciding to go on the road with our search for the "Church” living together in Love and enjoying the life that comes with walking in "The Way". After arriving at the St. Joe Church we remained there for a few short months. While living there and really seeking the "Living Church" after my time there I had many doubts and concerns and not yet willing to immerse myself there in that part of the Body of the Christ. Not being able to do so we left during a visit from "Yoneq" their Apostle. While staying there in St Joe, I had many dreams and visions about the life there while I was searching as to whether to graft myself and my tribe of 10 children into this Church. My wife,( who has divorced me 4 yrs ago now), had asked my blessing to join that Church and she did so while living there in the St. Joe Missouri. She immersed herself there through baptism believing if she did I would follow her. I think the leadership there thought the same thing. But after her baptism the leadership grew impatient with my putting the Church under my magnifying glass. Shortly before leaving St. Joe they invited my wife to go to the restaurant Sunday afternoon for a kind of quite time /brunch for her. There the shepherds confronted her, that she was committing "Adultery against Yahshua" because she loved me more than her new husband "Yahshua" After that she had a nervous break down and was missing for several hours. Then one of the shepherds came to me during evening worship time to ask me if I knew where she was ? yet never mentioning to me anything about the meeting. After a phone call from the local hospital and then myself going and retrieving her from the hospital mental ward, she would not return to the Church. I had to drive her to a friend’s home in southern Missouri and then return for my children and my belongings. During my weeks there I had many questions about their life there. what they really believed and how it all worked. Depending on whom I was asking the questions of, made a difference on how open the answer to those questions were. Most of the brothers and sisters that we had meet at the 3 different churches we had visited. IE, Harrison burg Va. (our first contact) West Palm Beach, St Joe. I found that persons at these churches that had been there for yrs and were not in positions of leadership were more up front and transparent / open about what really went on there. IE, what they loved about the life there and what they did not. Of those, many expressed frustration from their own spiritual search or journey that they had remain there because it was the closest thing they had found to what they believed "The Church" should really look like. These were the ones who I would have had great joy in grafting my self to ! But they, as is often in "The Church" were not the ones making the decision for the Church. Those in positions of service in the Church, I discerned had some knowledge about the life there they were either waiting to tell me. after I had taken certain steps in an approved direction. or because I was not baptized into "The Church" Therefore I could not understand or accept how things operated there. Scriptures warning of involvement in Secret Societies kept flowing through my mind and dreams while I was there and having experienced how the Mennonites / Amish use the sacraments and the ordinances of the "Church" to enforce conformity. This is a "cloak" or good looking "mask" which is used to control, Or to quench the “Voice of Dissen” which is very often the Holy Spirit speaking to the Church to direct it or a rebuke to say its made a mistake or is soon going too! The Crying out of a Broken Heart from within a person, often shows it's self through "dissent" its my experience that dissent within the Church is a great thing if the Church is alive enough not to act to silence it. But, when the arms of the Brothers and or Sisters placed around them the Church will hear that dissent and address it . which will give that broken Heart healing or sometimes lead it to repentance. There were some voices of dissent in Twelve Tribes. but they were heard only in private. because of fear of punishment from those in authority. Dissent is Good ! being afraid to voice it is not "Good" ever !!!! Actually, the biggest reasons I could not immerse my self in the "Church" there in " St. Joe". was that before going there we had visited and stayed in a "Church" in west Tennessee. called "Zion" and later after leaving St Joe we went and lived there. Anyway, during our first visit there. "Zion" even though things there were very unorthodox in many many ways and from the outside looking in, very unorganized ! However, I was touched inside like never before. but it was blowing my mind ! Even though there was an "Apostle" there ALL the men there made the decision's for the "Church" Through a "relationship of Love" that dwells in each of them for each other, that I had only witnessed before in what I call "Sparks" in a few individuals, " Disciples" through the years ! Looking back, it was the first time I had ever witnessed the "Glory" of the "Church" operating in full measure. Having recently left the Amish and the fact that my wife was religious. some of the issues she had only allowed her to see a little of the "Glory" that was shining there. She hated the place ! she had long before seen her self and our family at Twelve Tribes and felt that's where we belonged as a family. so we left "Zion" After our visit there was when we went to St. Joe. after leaving my wife in southern Missouri and returning to St. Joe. I meet with Yoneq and the shepherds there. I described to them what I had experience there in St. Joe and in Zion. I told them that I had never witnessed that kind of great "Love" between so many men in my life. but that I was distress / confused and really did not know what I should do. prior to meeting with them. I cried to God that I trusted him and he is God and he could speak to me through anyone ! To my amazement, it was Yoneq he chose. Yoneq said I needed to return to Zion. He instructed the Church there at St. Joe to return all of the material possessions that my wife had given to the Church and told one of the shepherds to give me money.- many of them looked shocked at the money part of the conversation. I don't recall the exactly amount… a few hundred dollars. Anyway, I am sorry this has turned into a small book ! We then returned to "Zion" we were welcomed back very warmly. My wife locked her self in our R.V. for 2 weeks and refused to immerse herself in the life there. I felt like I had come back home. I did not understand this feeling inside of me. we stayed for over a yr I think. but ended up leaving later because of many of our own issues and some we had about living there. we left suddenly and hurt many hearts there. We were gone for several months. then asked to come back to "Zion" this time I was reluctant and my wife was excited! I think at this point I was just tired of trying to figure it all out ! We returned in Jan. to an even warmer welcome back then our first return. the whole community was waiting along the hwy in a store parking lot some 50 miles out from the community in the rain waiting for us ! they were a sight for Heart Broken Eye's !!! As I got out of my bus and into the arms of those Brothers, Sisters and Children. again I felt that feeling again. I was home. that thing I felt inside gave me a Goofy Smile on the outside ! sometime after being back in "Zion" I meet a man who had come to visit and had seen what I saw there. while out in front off the Judah house It was affectionately called the “Mash-em Inn,” because there were so people many living there. As we were talking he began to weep with joy at what he was seeing and feeling. I responded by grabbing him by the hands and we jumped and danced for joy around the front of the house and back in forth through the buses parked there around Mash-em Inn like crazy men ! Never thinking who would see us. We didn't care ! a few weeks later I was Baptized and Born Again there in "Zion" at 43 yrs old. me and 3 other brothers at the same time in a cattle water trough. Looking back it was one of the most difficult places I have ever lived. at the same time the most wonderful place I have ever lived. not because it was a difficult economical area to make a living, but it was a Holy place there. because of God’s pleasure at what was happening there among and between us. Especially the men. It had become a kind of Heaven on earth, that he "God" allowed me to live, while my soiled heart, thoughts, lips, and hand's touched his "Holy Things" that has changed me forever. My words are insufficient to tell what I experienced and saw there. Noach, the "Apostle" in "Zion" and later my Tribe leader. once said he felt that the Scriptures that read " in my house are many "mansions" or some translations "Room's" he thought that those "Room's" were the "Heart's" of the Brothers and Sister's in the "Church" and by going through and living in those hearts "rooms" we are forever changed. I know I was. Anyway, I think that Twelve Tribes may have started in a similar way. let me explain. after becoming the "church" in that place and at that time. they were an expression of what had happened there "Island Pond" because of what had happened there. between the "Men" , "God" was now there, in his pleasure ! They too, were experiencing "almost" the same thing with many variations. years later in "Zion" But, what happened to Twelve Tribes is what happens in almost every place that this "Glory" comes and last for more than a few days. when this "Church" or "Churches grow/s and is ready to explode or divide. because they don't understand that in truth they had very little to do with what started there or that it even grew at all to what it is now. The way it starts is kind of "Organic". when they seek a new place to plant or to even replicate what has happened there, where they are. the very first misstep is often that they plan it to look like the place they have just come from. how UN "God" like or "UNGODLY" "God" is a Creator an Artist ! Just look around. I think that is when and where "Churches" like twelve Tribes, the Mennonite / Amish, Hutterites, others. start to become a "Shell" of what once was. "God" has not necessarily left them or even that place. we just have move from walking in his pleasure, his pleasure is the "fertilizer" that makes it all live ! placing men in charge of making it happen somewhere else. instead of letting what happened "Organically" were they were, just happen again. with "Liberty" allowing differences from or looking nothing like that "Church" they came from. because having that "Holy thing" within and between the "Hearts" of the Men is the "Organics" that brings "God" there in His Pleasure and it grows only because of that Pleasure ! its a "Mystery" when that happens what Manifest there is "Heaven" on earth to those "God" calls to see it there in that place and they do come from near and far. We did, you did, all of us . its hard out here, I am making it. sometimes barely making it. Truthfully, I am just existing. after "Zion" not living with in that life really is empty. I have in some ways lost my family. I mean my children Love me, when they get to see me ! My wife has a lot of anger toward me. I think mostly because things did not work out. she likes to make it hard on me. "visitation" etc, after 19 yrs together she felt it was not working out and it was just time for her to cut her loses. I forgive her. I have a few times thought about asking to visit there at Rose Creek. not to see what it’s like now necessarily, but so I could ask the men's forgiveness. because at the time I left, I did not trust them with my heart and what I was going through then. I even lied to some of them while planning my exit. which I have never forgiven my self for. it was wrong ! It was wrong to just sneak out of there. they deserved better from me. Anyway, I guess I never did because I did not want to be turned down. if I could I would. I am sure it has changed there over the yrs I have been gone. but it’s strange to say it, but I feel like I have family there.and some times I have weep over it. . I guess this has been inside waiting to come out. There are wonderful people in Twelve Tribes, in Zion, in The Mennonite and Amish Churches and in most every church I have spent time in. I am sure from what I have heard others say that when Twelve Tribes began they experienced a "Glory" of "Gods Pleasure" there in Island Pond. it was once bright ! But its now very dim. only "Sparks" left in certain ones. its not very bright because "Control" is wearing the Cloak /mask of Law / organization and Conformity. anyway, after living in both, the only dance that makes me smile that Goofy Looking Smile is the dance that is not taught or rehearsed but the one that comes after seeing or living in a place where Brothers are dwelling together in unity ! Not where a mask is placed over the face for guests to see or by telling people that without rules and regulation's "Law"and "True Unity" can't exist. I have found that "The Holy Spirit" only dwells among men who are well pleasing to him. that only happens when there is that "Unity" that lives only because of "Love" one for another. happening often when they are not intentionally doing so ! it's just happening and at the same time the Glory of God "His Pleasure" is there also. when I have experienced it, it was a place I never wanted to leave. because to feel his Delight, his pleasure in the mist of brother's in this "Unity" is something my Heart and others still long for to this day. It changes you inside forever ! I hope one day to find it again somewhere. I don't care where or how. being there changes me. Anyway, I don't know if this "Holy" thing is still At Rose Creek. even if its not there shining brightly. I know it is there in the hearts of some of the Men. Hoping to feel "His" Pleasure again. maybe you could go there to visit. but "Twelve Tribes" it is not. anyway, I apologize for the length of this letter. but it did come from my Heart. if you find somewhere, the things I have shared have helped, please contact me ! Peace, (name deleted)"a sinner" (Yahshua, was a Friend of Sinners) | ||
| nabashalam (nabashalam) Intermediate Member Username: nabashalam Post Number: 349 Registered: 11-2005 Posted From: 198.150.40.60 |
This, my friends, is what I intend to find out... | ||
| hope_20 (hope_20) Member Username: hope_20 Post Number: 59 Registered: 10-2005 Posted From: 71.243.41.182 |
naba, why do you think yoneq willingly gave away money? i'll bet there was some sort of ulterior motive behind that one. | ||
| faye (faye) Intermediate Member Username: faye Post Number: 136 Registered: 10-2005 Posted From: 207.69.140.51 |
I don't think so hope...I know some others that were sent off with some money, some not. I really appreciated that he included that piece of information. We are talking about a family with 10 kids and a woman having a nervous breakdown! It would take a pretty cold person to send them away with absolutely nothing. On the other hand, it might have been like --Here! Here's some money! Go on your way!<with> That's a LOT for any community to take on, especially one as dysfunctional as St Joe was at that time....(which is probably why Yoneq was there) | ||
| hope_20 (hope_20) Member Username: hope_20 Post Number: 60 Registered: 10-2005 Posted From: 71.243.41.182 |
maybe, i just cant picture it ever happening | ||
| nabashalam (nabashalam) Intermediate Member Username: nabashalam Post Number: 351 Registered: 11-2005 Posted From: 198.150.40.60 |
Law suits? | ||
| nabashalam (nabashalam) Intermediate Member Username: nabashalam Post Number: 477 Registered: 1-2006 Posted From: 66.82.9.80 |
Im just bringing this to the top for my friends at Rose Creek who have been searching for it. Many at Rose Creek are faithful readers here now and missed this wonderful letter to them and may I be the one to say that this man has been forgiven and is welcomed back, even urged to come visit or even stay. He is loved as Yahshua would love him here... | ||
| jacob (jacob) Intermediate Member Username: jacob Post Number: 375 Registered: 11-2004 Posted From: 131.216.24.154 |
David, How did you all weather the latest cold front? Jacob | ||
| nabashalam (nabashalam) Intermediate Member Username: nabashalam Post Number: 479 Registered: 1-2006 Posted From: 69.19.14.29 |
Well, a week ago we got about 3" of snow and the children loved it! They dont see it too often. The last couple days weve had a few pipes freeze and burst. They are really not set up down here in Tn for long hard freezes! But we survived! Thanks for asking. Oh! By the way, if your still in Vegas we are going to have several brothers, two elders for sure, in Vegas for a dealers convention for one of our window tinting cottage industry! Its a shame that its dealers only and theyll be tied up with business... Unless of course you'd really like to talk to them...Same goes for Randy or any other Lost Wages residents... | ||
| randyspenser (randyspenser) Intermediate Member Username: randyspenser Post Number: 269 Registered: 10-2005 Posted From: 71.50.81.230 |
Im still here David (unfortunately) | ||
| nabashalam (nabashalam) Intermediate Member Username: nabashalam Post Number: 480 Registered: 1-2006 Posted From: 66.82.9.86 |
Randy, There will be a brother and elder there this weekend named Nathaniel and Im sure he would love to talk to you if you would like to... Let me know. Youve got my email address... | ||
| nabashalam Senior Member Username: nabashalam Post Number: 1894 Registered: 1-2006 Posted From: 68.190.117.25 |
I wanted to throw in a update here. As you all know, I left RCV in June of 2006, and said some nasty stuff about them. (true by the way) I repented and asked to come back. (my usual M.O. battered spouse pattern) They told me not to contact them for 6 months and I havent spoken to them since. http://www.factnet.org/discus/messages/3/22127.html Seems like there are increasing amounts of people/families being "sent away" at RCV due to "dissent"! Their numbers have increased, logistics demand that control be tightened which is in turn squeezing out the love, the intimacy... Also their "economic complex" is failing and they are sending people out into "the world" to find jobs and bring home paychecks. They just cant stand to curtail their vacations, trips to Walmart and Dairy Queen and suffer a little. They have grown fat and comfortable and must keep their standard of living no matter what the cost. They have lost their "first love" and have become an institution. "Man the life rafts! Noahs Ark is sinking!!!" |
